Don’t let the languid canals fool you. This place is 24/7 hype, swag and “oh-my-God!” It’s also one of the friendliest, most enjoyable cities in the world.
Mix Venice canals with 1960s Berkeley cool. Layer on centuries of history, immigrants and visitors from everywhere, a friendly, fit and forward-thinking local populace. Stir. Continually.
What you get is Amsterdam.
The tree-lined canals make it look languid and laid-back, but this city rocks. The nearest other European capital, Brussels, may be historic, charming and lively, but it’s a mausoleum compared to Amsterdam.
BEER AND BUZZ
Maybe it’s the beer. I mean, these are the folks who gave us Heineken. It’s also the only place I’ve been where a beer in a restaurant may cost the same as a Coke.
Then there’s all the marijuana you can legally consume here in the infamous “coffeeshops” all over town. Even souvenir stands offer “special” cookies, chocolate bars and lollipops — not to mention posters of President Barack Obama with the words “Yes We Can(nabis).”
People blaze up inside, outside, almost anywhere, with virtual impunity.
Amsterdam is surely the “contact high” capital of the world.
But if the older Dutch buildings seem to be leaning in on you, it’s not because you’re buzzed.
Click on the pic, right, and enlarge it. See those beams sticking out from the top of the buildings? Movers attach pulleys to them to lift your furniture to the upper floors. That slight forward lean in the building keeps somebody else’s sofa from crashing through your window — or vice versa — on the way up.
Cheese is a big deal here, too. You’d expect that in a country where farmers were so proud of their cows, they commissioned artists to paint portraits of them. And no, I’m not kidding.
Amsterdam also is and has the world’s biggest flower market — including one that floats on barges.
The city’s Red Light District, meanwhile, grows a different variety of flower.
PAY FOR PLAY
“Working girls” in all shapes, sizes and colors stand like living manikins in lingerie and heels in their rented windows for eight-hour shifts, trying — with varying degrees of success — to look enticing.
It’s all routine, and totally legal. Even outside the Red Light District, tourist hotels sell nightclub tours offering unlimited shots, free T-shirts and “a night you will forever try to remember.” One entertainment guide promises “sex, drugs and normal options.”
I wanted to ask what the “normal options” were, but my feet were tired, my head was spinning and I was starting to get the munchies.
It may or may not be a coincidence, but tour guides here will tell you that while you see a lot of churches in and around Amsterdam, you won’t find nearly as many folks in them as in decades and centuries past. A lot of them are being converted to museums and other uses.
Traditionalists say this is sacrilege. The opposing view argues that it’s better to turn these stately, historic houses of worship into museums than turn them over to the wrecking ball. I have to go along with that.
Even without the narcotic groove or the pre-paid intimacy, people are friendly here. Strangers may smile or say hello — without an agenda. The busiest cashier, after wishing you a nice day, still sends you off with a polite “good-bye!”
That cashier may hail from Ghana and speak three languages, like the one in the HEMA department store. “And I’m learning Japanese!” he added with a grin.
Drive on, my brother, drive on…
AGONY AND ARTISTRY
Indeed, Amsterdam residents seem almost pointedly multilingual, which makes finding English speakers pretty much a non-issue.
Another big plus: Virtually every flavor of culture and every shade of the human rainbow are found in Amsterdam. So if you’re black, you won’t be getting stared at, as can happen elsewhere.
Indeed, if you’re the type who craves public attention, this city just might give you a complex.
There’s a lot of history here, much of it tragic. Think you have a difficult home life? Visit the Anne Frank House. There’s also a museum dedicated to the Dutch resistance, who defied their Nazi occupiers in World War 2.
When your country is home to Vincent van Gogh and a whole school of painters known as the Dutch masters, you can expect a ton of art museums, and Amsterdam has them.
Don’t have time for the museums? You can see some of those Dutch masterworks for free in Amsterdam’s Schiphol airport, one of the world’s very best international air terminals.
There are other treasures. Amsterdam is one of the world’s headquarters for diamonds, and you can see them being cut and shaped here.
TRAMS, BUSES AND BIKES
No need to rent a car; Amsterdam has that whole public transportation thing down. A stream of trams, buses and underground Metro trains make getting around easy.
The trams have a tiny booth angled into one side of the rear car where a conductor sits and sells you tickets. (One conductor, after we told him the relatively short distance we were traveling, actually let us ride for free!)
But table-flat Amsterdam mainly moves on bicycles — single-gear, fat-tire black bikes built like two-wheeled tanks. Some of them have plastic crates mounted over their front wheels, big enough to hold a Thanksgiving turkey — or a small child.
There’s a joke that says Amsterdam’s canals are all nine meters deep — three meters of water, three of mud and three of bikes. Believe it. They’re everywhere — and they have the right-of-way! Between the bikes and the trams, just crossing the street can be a major adventure.
Look both ways, at least twice.
AMSTERDAM ROCKS — AND FLOATS
The canals themselves are lined with barges, most of which have been converted into houseboats. Living rooms, bedrooms, kitchens, even gardens on deck.
The Dutch sense of humor also floats. Where else are you going to find a motorboat in the shape of an old-fashioned wooden shoe?
You can have so much fun here that you don’t even think about the fact that Amsterdam sits 13 feet below sea level. This city is one failed levee from becoming Europe’s Katrina. But what does overflow here, constantly, is Amsterdam’s vibe, the energy, creativity and joy of living that its residents and visitors combine to create.
There is no submerging that.
DID YOU KNOW?
Van Gogh’s arguably most famous painting “The Starry Night,” was the inspiration for a hit 1970 pop song by Don McLean called “Vincent.” But you won’t find it in the Van Gogh Museum in Amsterdam. It’s in the Museum of Modern Art in New York City.
Van Gogh actually did another painting in an almost identical style, “Starry Night over the Rhone.” It’s not in Amsterdam, either. That one’s in the Musee d’Orsay in Paris.
You keep topping yourself! This felt like something that I wish I read while laying in a lazy hammock! It is one of the most comprehensive “cover-almost-all-the-bases” recap of the sum total of your experiences in one of the most fun cities in the world! You are right on about Brussels being a mausoleum compared to Amsterdam. I’d go further and say Brussels, outside of its humongous main square and the over-hyped mannekin-pis statue, is incredibly overrated. Brugges is quaint and picturesque, but Amsterdam has a little bit of everything, like a Disneyland for adults. My two visits to the city were unforgettable. I have to admit though, that going through the Red Light District with a camera was a big mistake. I didn’t take any pictures but man oh man, did I get a lot of glares. That place feels like a novelty by day, but dangerous by night. Ate all of our meals in the Leidesplein area, got tizzy with the constant beers. Around the Rijkmuseum, a van turned a corner too sharply and its passenger side mirror hit me in the elbow, knocking it into pieces onto the ground. No harm to me, just felt like a nudge, but the van kept going. Loved the trams and even the boat tour around the canals which I thought would be overrated. All was fabulous. This is a city, to me, anyway, after you’re done w/the two major museums and the Anne Frank House, that should be experienced by walking everywhere, almost without an itinerary. It’s hard to believe the stories of tensions between the city and its Muslim population; when we were there, we didn’t see anything odd or people giving off weird looks. This city is truly the epitome of capturing the “almost anything goes” spirit.
One night I had to visit a hospital very late at night to take care of something minor, just outside the main city. I have to say, that was the scariest part of our entire trip. Not the hospital, but the train ride after hours with teenage hooligans/gangs on board that looked menacing. That was the only time I was frightened, but we kept our demeanors not in “tourist mode,” but “we know what we’re doing and we belong here mode.” Thank goodness we weren’t carrying bags of swag and tourist tschotchkes with us otherwise who knows, we would’ve been easy targets. Amsterdam, like all cities, have regions where you shouldn’t be lingering too long at night. But what a place! Your blog post makes us want to put it back on the map for a return visit! Did you get to see Van Gogh’s “Wheatfield and Crows,” said to be one of his last major paintings? That thing has traveled all over the world on “loan” and we caught it once in Amsterdam and then later as part of a loan/tour in L.A. Seem to recall that at both venues, no photos were allowed, but I could be wrong. It’s been more than 10 years since we were last in the Netherlands. Greeat post! Thank you, Greg!
Great post and photos, Greg!